#77. See A Counselor

#77. See a Counselor


"Sometimes the smallest step in the right direction ends up being the biggest step of your life. Tip toe if you must, but take the step."


The above quote is so true. It's hard to know at the time that the steps you are taking will change everything. But looking back, you can see it.

A year ago I was in a bad, unhealthy place, to say the least. After looking for what felt like forever for a job, I was coming up empty handed. No one wanted to hire me. I was, physically, in the worst shape I had ever been. I was at my highest weight, a number that I never thought would be possible. I was confined to my apartment because my car wasn't working. I was in a boot (or supposed to be) so walking was a pain. There were days I didn't want to do it anymore. It was too hard. I felt disconnected from God, from friends, from myself.

After going to a counseling center and experiencing some really bad sessions, John told me about an intern at his office. He said he thought she would be a good fit for me. At that point, I didn't have anything to lose.

So I took a step. I went. The first session was hard and tear filled. But refreshing at the same time. I can't say that every session was progress. In fact, the moment I thought I was making progress, we moved to every other week... then all hell broke loose in my life. The fire at work, my dad passing. What I thought I could do "alone" wasn't true. I needed someone to help me process all the things going on around me.

A year later, I am still in counseling. I don't go as often, but it is nice to know that if I needed it, I can call and make an appointment. If not, then I wait for the next scheduled appointment. It was a small step that I didn't think would change anything. But in fact, it has changed everything.

I'm a different person than I was a year ago. I am more confident and I love my life. And no that's not just because I have a boyfriend. I felt that way before he came along. I'm making progress. Life is a continual journey of processing and growth.